1 John 4:18-19 “18 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. 19 We love because he first loved us.”
Do you remember when I said long, long ago, that when God talks to me He usually has to tell me anything important at least three times? Bingo!
This week He’s been talking to me about love. I know it is the Christmas season, and love/charity is “in the air.” It’s like one time a year the world recognizes the gift(we know it to be a sacrifice) of Heavenly Dad giving his beloved son. His love message for me has gone much deeper.
Eric and I were talking about when we first met, almost 14 months ago. We discussed how we felt then and how we feel now. That reflection took us back to the core values of love. We pondered how Heavenly Dad fills us up to the point we are so full of His love it spills onto everyone else—we can’t help it.
That spun into what happens when we’re not feeling close to the Lord. Sometimes we sense a distance, it seems like HD is quiet and we feel…empty. Upon contemplation came the theme, for at least a period of time, for me: you can’t give what you don’t have.
The next day my devotions was about that very thing. If you’re counting, that makes three. Wisdom Hunters was speaking about two enemies of love: fear and pride. That devotional was a life changer and here is that link: https://www.wisdomhunters.com/two-enemies-of-love/
I can’t stress the need for everyone to read this devotional by Shawna Schuette. Her insight puts perspective and description of the exact conversation Eric and I were having, aka, You can’t give what you don’t have.
If you are full of fear, which is often self preservation, there’s no room for love. If you’re full of pride, which often is self-hate in disguise, there’s no room for love. We are God’s vessels and when we become empty of ourselves then we can be full of God‘s love-flash back to last week’s, “I want More!”
Due to past relationships failures, Eric clings to fear, not trusting completely because he doesn’t want to get hurt. He has stepped out in faith that Heavenly Dad can heal the wounds and cut through the scar tissue, trusting that God will not “just” restore but teach him HOW to love. It’s sometimes a painful process for both of us but I respect and admire how hard he is working to move himself out of God’s way. He is trying to recognize when he feels vulnerable as that is when fear sets in. He is amazing in his drive to heal so he can someday pass on what Heavenly Dad is teaching him. Eric has given me permission to share his journey.
As for me, the self-hate is a stronghold I struggle to shake. It can easily appear as pride because I keep people at a distance. It may appear as though I am puffed up and the reality is I don’t want anyone seeing how stupid I actually feel.
At least we are broken together 😉. Heavenly Dad is revealing our love “issues” so He can teach us how to love like Him. This journey begins today.
Until next time: Blessings!