The Choice to Begin A Rough Draft

Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”

Mark Gunger, said something like,”People settle for miseries they know instead of seeking blessings they don’t know because we hate change. Wanting or expecting something to change but continuing to do the same things over and over is a definition of insanity.”

Not quite a year ago my life was on the brink of change and I had a choice to make: fight the change or as my mom used to say,”roll with the punches,” aka adapt and move forward.

The circumstances prompting the change were whistle and bell whooping awesome: Taylor and Kristian were engaged to be married. Taylor realized, being that she was my best friend, our relationship needed to adapt as her time and focus needed to be on her beloved. She choose selflessness and healing by encouraging me to begin the dating process—a painful/difficult decision.

Some think that would be an easy or natural step forward, but not for me. I needed to know IF I wanted to date and the reasons behind that decision. I had already had the,”Once upon a time,” so how do you even begin writing the rough draft for a Volume 2?

For me, I knew IF I started dating I didn’t want to open myself up to dudes walking in and out of my life and confusing my feelings and emotions. The thought that I could just find a “friend,” means many attempts, with all the awkwardness, of trying to get to know people on a deeper level—ewwwwe—so uncomfortable. IF I was going to date, I knew I’d be looking for a mate (rhyming intentional), so how the heck do I make such a huge decision? Heavenly Dad.

Linda, the CEO of Heartfelt Creations, was speaking about a book on the topic of “Changing Your Brain.” I was searching for this on the internet but another book grabbed my attention: Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts.

“Do I, don’t I…?” I knew if I pursued dating again, this time I’d have 30 years of memories and experiences, aka baggage but not all bad, coming with me. How would I balance and what tools did or could I find to help? This seemed like a reasonable place to start so I hit,”Place Order,” and with that, my research began: Did I want to date? If yes, why? I wasn’t really lonely, I was spending lots of time with Heavenly Dad, traveling to teach and training, and was super busy with house remodeling. Did I even have time for the luxury of dating?

The book came in and “school was in session.” What the book reminded me of was the challenges of marriage: melding two individuals into one: the compromises, accommodations, sacrifices, and serving. The book honestly reminded me of how much I missed all of that. Another person can see my/your blind spots and I/you then have the ability to make tweaks and become a better person. In my heart and soul, two made a complete one. I knew what I wanted/needed to do.

The funny part of that story was that the book traveled with me. I had to explain when people asked the normal question,”What are you reading?” why I was reading a book on marriage when I wasn’t even dating! Eh, part of the journey and maybe a challenge for someone else who is thinking about starting a rough draft for a volume 2, perhaps not for dating, but a different change in your life. What doors has HD opened to position you for research material? Ultimately, was this blog for you? Will you hit, “Place Order,” visit the destination, make the call, take the interview? What are YOU going to do?

Until next time: Blessings!

Author: Tracy Cook

Widowed one week before our 27th wedding anniversary, Heavenly Dad continues to carry me, now blessing me with a second chance for love.

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