Last week I said I was going to talk about the amazing Boston Red Sox game, a team of whom I am now a fan, but then came Monday.
This was more than just your average,”Oh, pooh…it’s Monday,” this was a “My mother-in-law had gone into the hospital last week and they called in hospice today,” Monday. I’d never had one of those before. Honestly, few people do. Two days later she went home. Two husbands and four children, including one she lost during pregnancy, have gone before her, so I’m sure she was ready.
The glowing memory of the baseball game is dim today. I ponder the 29+ years I knew Corky and all of her…corkyness. How she taught me to roast a turkey but never left her chair, touched the turkey or even the oven! “Walt, get into that cabinet down below and get the roasting pan. It’s the dark, long, deep one. James get into that cabinet above the sink and get the glass cup measure. It’s the big one, 4 cups,” and on she went with the turkey, butter and seasonings.” I laughed at the time but I was was secretly taking it all in because I had NO idea how to roast a turkey.
The quarter game that she had to play on my thigh not Archie’s because, “He has skinny legs and her’s are wider.” :o) There were other things like the pencil and the string trick to “predict” how many kids Archie and I were going to have. Her count was a little off as she predicted four. We lost two to miscarriage and we, of course, had Taylor, so she was close!
And now she is with Arch and has been introduced to my two precious ones I have yet to meet.
I was struggling this morning with even labeling how I feel. Taylor is going through physical challenges on top of me trying to mentally wrap my mind around the finality of another piece of life’s puzzle. I came up…confused and speechless. So, as in the past, heavenly Dad grabbed my attention and my heart through a song:
Today is a valley day but it was also a church day. After heavenly Dad gave me this song He sent me to His house to learn about Habbakkuk who had far more guts than me. He had the nerve to question God about people who were living stupid and needed to be thwaped. Then about other injustices. God came back basically with,”You don’t/can’t see the big picture. Trust me. Know that everything is going to be ok.”
To me it was like He was saying, “Remember our chat this morning? I am the God of the hills and valleys because I am the one that created the playing field,”In the beginning… .” You are not alone in your feelings, but the answer is the same: trust, have faith, let go, knowing I am caring for the big picture. I love you. I’ve got this.”
Maybe next week I’ll get to the Red Sox, but for now: Blessings!