My heavenly Dad is keeping me on my toes. His latest role in my life is, “Organizational Manger.”
Another short night, that’s pretty usual since Arch went home. Last night we went for our second-to-last dance class and “got our twirls on.” Yep, I stink, but I sweated my heiny off and did not break or pull anything soooo, another successful night: check.
I had a rough time settling in when we got home and I’m not sure why. I kept pacing, eating chocolate and drinking coffee (decaf, no worries), but nothing seemed to fill this weird void. Taylor is usually asleep by 8:30 but the unrest was contagious.
We went through cupboards, pulling out “extras” that we, as a family of two, don’t need so we are donating to the Depot. Arch and I always planned on a big family, but the adoption thing never panned out. Hmmmm…wonder why God closed that door, huh? Had we adopted one of our last foster children, he would be 9 and I would have 9 years of single parenting through elementary, middle, and high school. I now consider my heavenly Dad merciful for closing that door.
Then we saved all of the dishes for family get togethers, but we now realize that only happens at funerals, graduations, and weddings. Since we are hoping for no more funerals, Taylor says no more graduating and she’s not even interested in the marriage thing at all, at the moment, we really have no reason to have stacks of plates and serving dishes. So, why store them? Besides, “hillbilly china” aka paper plates, are definitely the way to do meet ups.
Taylor made a great point,”When we were a family of three I really thought this house was too small. Now I wonder how we accumulated so much stuff.” Bingo. That’s because when “the dream” ended so so did our list of supplies for that dream.
New dreams, new supplies. Hmmm…that would preach.
It’s really kinda of weird what our expectations are when we first start off in our fairy tale:
First: All you need is EACH OTHER
Then it’s: Each other, a running car, and a place to live (any apartment will do–because you have each other)
But…you’d be actually saving money if you buy a house–which is true.
Then you under think the repairs that go into a house so another job is a necessity, so a second car is needed. Now you have a house and two cars that you own…or do they own you?
Wait, wait, you must fill the house with stuff, right? First garage sale stuff, just so you have furniture to sit on, but “Nancy just got the cutest lamp from ___,” and “Did you see Ted’s garage of tools?”
Hmf. The garage sale stuff looks so shabby. It’s only a few bucks to buy something better.
Now our nicer stuff makes the house look shabby. “Besides, did you see who just moved next door?” So, now a nicer house in a better part of town is really what we need, right? Then the kid(s) come. Again, we SAY we’re going to go to garage sales after we have kids, but after the baby shower, where everyone bought you NAME BRAND NEW, how the heck can you go backwards? Really, what would people say?
Now you have to find a daycare because we have a house, two cars, name brand furniture, some of which we put on credit cards, so now we have monthly payment, a growing child who constantly needs new clothes, and wait…we didn’t think about school systems when we moved… .
House number three, in the better school system, even though it cost even more money than the other house, that cost more money than the first house, and now one of the cars is constantly breaking down (it’s not paid off yet) and we need to trade it in for a different, NEW car, one with the built in DVD player–because “Johnny is almost 2 and is so difficult in the car, a van would be better, and Sally will be here in 4 more months, so it only makes sense to plan for the future.”
Then all of the sudden everyone is working too much, the kids have their noses pointed to a computer or video game 24-7, mom and dad barely ever talk, unless it’s about how they are scarcely making the month’s bills while dad is working overtime, and mom is working and balancing the home and it all started out with
All we need is each other… .
No, this is not the life Arch and I had. We did move a lot, but not to nicer houses, just another fixer, but we would hear and feel the pain of others that did have that life…and then the divorce because this was not the life either of them EVER wanted. More pain.
Anyway, to make a long story short–too late–though that was never our life, we still filled our house up with meaningless stuff for dreams we made for ourselves, not for the plans God had for us.
Luke 12:24 “Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds!”
We stored up all kinds of stuff for the lives we had planned: a couple of kids, then a nice house with a big yard, lots of toys and books, for when the grandkids come. We wanted to be very involved grandparents.
Hmf. Now, if that ever happens, I will be a single grandparent. No financially spoiling the grandkid on a single income, but if I trust that my heavenly Dad is going to give me what I need, when I need it, the grandkid is going to be over joyed just to have: me (and whatever my heavenly dad gives us at that time)!
No reason to store the toys, books, dishes, and so on for a life that may not ever be what my heavenly Dad planned for me. But this I know: He will give me EVERYTHING I need, when I need it, no storage facility needed.
Hebrews 12:1 “So then let’s also run the race that is laid out in front of us, since we have such a great cloud of witnesses surrounding us. Let’s throw off any extra baggage, get rid of the sin that trips us up.”
Well, I’d best get busy. I have more closets to clean out. I don’t have any new dreams so, I think they’ll stay empty until my heavenly Dad tells me what goes in them.
Until tomorrow: Blessings!