Our second night of Grief Share. I could tell this last week I was seriously being lifted up in prayer because last week’s anger was inexpressible. Much better, seven days later. I haven’t even slammed any doors–lately ;).
This week the most interesting topic came up: fear. What are we afraid of? One lady summed up my feelings as if she stepped into my soul. She said her fear is: people will forget her loved ones. Others stop saying their name, or won’t talk about them in front of her. Bingo. I teared….again.
We also talked about our relationship with God. Some feel that He’s just not around anymore, God takes away anything they feel blessed with, or they have done something wrong and their loss is God’s punishment.
I guess Taylor and I are somewhat grateful. Neither one of us have these feeling about God. We both feel that though painful, natural consequences suck, but happen. Not God’s fault. Few at our meeting share our peace.
Psalms 143:7-8 “Answer me quickly, O Lord! My spirit fails!
Hide not your face from me, lest I be like those who go down to the pit.
8 Let me hear in the morning of your steadfast love, for in you I trust.
Make me know the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul.”
We don’t blame God, but that doesn’t mean that sometimes it doesn’t feel like He took his hands off and allowed our world to spin out of control. The video shared that if you are in the basement, you pull the blinds down over the windows, and are submerged in darkness….the sun is still shining outside. So it is with our Heavenly Dad.
We may be in a very dark spot and cannot see our hand in front of our face. Be guaranteed, God is still all around us, waiting for us to let in the light and bask in the “Sonshine”. We have to choose the “next right thing” and….pull up the shades.
We have asked Him to, “Make me know the way I should go,” but are still waiting on the answer. How do we handle the wait? “for in you I trust”.
Lord willing, someday we’ll understand.